I’m a makeup snob, I admit it. I have the Sephora receipts to prove it. It’s not that spending $26 for an eyeshadow makes me happy, except that dammit, it does. I keep one-upping myself. I told myself that Benefit and Urban Decay were as far as I was going… until I got the Stila…. and then Cargo was the end of the line, until I got my Laura Mercier tinted foundation. I’m telling you Clinique is the marijuana of the make up world… it’s the GATEWAY DRUG MAKEUP that leads one down roads that one can not return from. What I’m saying is, if you still buy all your makeup at Walgreens and Target – good for you. At least you’ll never end up in makeup rehab sobbing into your Korres Pomegranate Cleansing and Makeup Removing Wipes while swearing you WON’T BUY THE NARS!
Despite my “little problem”, I have a few bargain items that I absolutely love and wouldn’t trade for anything expensive and I thought I’d share them with you.
This is my favorite mascara:
The rich black has great coverage, it doesn’t flake and it really does lengthen your lashes.
The only slight downside is that is smells very strongly of honey. If you dig the smell of honey, you are golden. If, like me, you are a little put off by it… well, you suck it up because it’s a damn good mascara for $5 and if you have to deal with smelling like you’ve plunged you eyeballs into a beehive, so be it.
My can’t live with it eyeshadow:
CoverGirl eyeshadow in “Champagne”.
I use this daily at the very edge of my entire lid. It brightens your eyes/takes the tired look out and makes your eyeliner pop. It’s ridiculously cheap… I don’t know… $2-3? Who wouldn’t pay $3 every 6 months to be able to fool the world into thinking you actually got a good night’s sleep and didn’t wander around the house reading magazines, watching Poker After Dark, eating string cheese and peeing every 15 minutes? I’m just sayin’.
My favorite “lippy”:
I used to be really into Bigelow&Co Mentha lip tint…
But honestly, there is only so much of my life that I can live with half my hair stuck to my lips. People with the whole front of their hair attached to their mouth just… I don’t know… lose a little bit of credibility in life. To that end, I’m really over lipglosses that are sticky. I’m going back to basics.
My current faves:
Both are super cheap, and at least IN THEORY, prevent me from peeling my chapped lips off.
My favorite actual gloss that I wear when I want some nice color is:
By Benfit. One side is a watery, rose petal smelling red tint – and the other side is a sweet clear, shiny gloss. The tint is lovely because it takes on the color of your actual lips…just more rosey. It’s a very natural look and there is something about putting something that smells like roses on my lips that transports me… just for a moment… to some 1800’s brothel with giant feathers in my hair and layers of ruffled skirts around my ankles.. and man, if you dont’ get that… then I can’t explain it to ya. This one is a Sephora item — around $20.
I have been using Focus21 hairspray since 1987 and I will continue to use it until the day the pry it from my cold, dead hands… or the day they stop making it (AKA, the day I go on a frenzy and buy up every last bottle known to man-kind).
I don’t know if my hair is used to it, or my brain is used to it – but I have to have it. It’s cheap ($4) but hard to find – most often located at Ulta.
Does the smell of it still make me crave a Zima with Midori and want to hum “All That She Wants” by Ace of Base?
My favorite product in the shower/bath…
Vanilla Chai Sugar scrub cubes by Naiad…sold on Etsy.
They are $13.50 for a jar of them.
If finishing a hot shower feeling scrubbed, shiny, revitalized… and smelling like you’ve just rolled in a pan of gooey cinnamon rolls and rinced off with some spicy tea sounds good to you… do it. You won’t regret it.
Your man will love how you smell, but he might get annoyed when this is what he hears for several hours after your shower:
Seriously. Smell me again.
My arm. Smell my arm.
It’s amazing, right?
I know. It’s amazing….
Can you take out the garbage, because it’s interfering with how much you can smell me…