deeples

Poker & Memphis

January31

Thanks for all the messages from everyone asking how the poker emergency went!  I’ll try to capture that…. as well as our trip to Tucson…

Nothing exciting happened on the trip there… Steph picked me up in Memphis and we made the 40 minute drive to Tunica.  (Passed the really big strip club misspelled “Caberet”…) Marveled all all the…. glop… everywhere.. remnants of the flooding last fall.  We quickly checked into the room and headed off to the poker room as Steph and Karen were about to start Day 2 of the big 10K tourney.  I got that weird itchy MUST PUT MONEY IN SOMETHING feeling when I got near the slot machines – but was quickly reminded why slot machines are from hell.

I hung out in the poker room with them most of the day — I missed Phil Ivey, Daniel Negraneu and Mike the Mouth Matasow as they were all knocked out the day before.  Karen had Eric Lindgren and Barry Greenberg at her table — Steph had D’Agostino and Mihn the Master as well as other pros that I can’t recall.  Clonie was there… and Liz Leu….  Andrew Black (The Buddist) were all there.  The Grinder…. We saw TJ Cloutier…etc.  It was weird to stand right next to them.  They are just normal jokers. Mihn is so short he had to pile two chair on top of one another to sit at the table properly…  it was very surreal.  The floor guy, MarkFrank (his name is Mark but Steph thought it was Frank so I called him Frank in my mind for several days) gave me a cool spinner and a multitude of free lunches.  I was dressed sort of the like the press that was there for the poker magazines so everyone just sort of let me wander around the tables….

Both Steph and Karen went out that day (Friday) … which was sad… but they played really well. Steph made it to around 100th — and it paid to 50th.  We hung out and didn’t do much that night.

On Saturday, Steph and I played in a $500 60 no limit tourney courtesy of her very generous and lovely mom… Steph went out early on and I ALMOST got in the money! Went out 23rd out of 147 people and it paid the top 18 spots.  I was knocked out by Olga Varkonyi something – who’s husband won the 2002 World Series of Poker. I had pocket 8s and was short stacked. I went all in and she called me with 9/10 off suit.  She caught a 10 on the river and that was that — she went on to win the whole tournament – $25,000.   I got so close to the money that Steph’s mom paid for me to play in the tounament again on Sunday!!

There were only 50 players this time and they only paid the top 5 seats…. I made it to the final table and went out 10th, if you can believe it.  This time I had A/10 suited AGAINST the other guy’s pocket 8s — he flopped an 8 and that was that.   I knocked out James Worth, who had recently won a World Poker Tour event — and I knocked Mike Sica out BOTH DAYS — and he won a bracelet in 2004.  Anyhoo….  it was lots of fun and it was great validation to know that I am good enough to play at that level.  Most of the people I met thought I played the circuit and I tried not to laugh out loud when they asked me…….

Otherwise, Steph and I had a blast…. we laughed and giggled and kept her mom up all night (who had a bad cold).. and generally just enjoyed each other. Her mom copped a freak out here and there – but otherwise it was great.

Ooooohh — but then Monday morning, the wake up call I was supposed to get never came for my 6am flight. We finally get the call and they are apologizing profusely etc… we race downstairs to see if I can still make my flight and discover WHY we didn’t get the call.  The entire front of the hotel was smashed to shit… glass all over the entire football field sized marble lobby.  Mangled metal everywhere.  I thought a bomb had gone off until I saw the large Pontiac sitting in the middle of the lobby.  A disgruntled player had apparently decided to kamakazi the hotel…

Just when I thought I was going to get through a trip without any random weirdness….

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Another poker night

January10

I need to begin by admitting that I am SIZZLING on one hell of a caffeine buzz right now.  Someone brought in this excellent organic dark roast coffee from Kowalski’s (Morning Star, it’s called) and I’ve had 2 cups of that one top of the hazelnut latte that Kor made me this morning (thanks, honey)… so, I’m contemplating climbing out of my own skin pretty soon.  I swear, even the air around me is cracklin’….

Went to play poker at Santorini’s again last night with Julie…just us girls. She was nervous because she completely blew off that guy she was dating (“Shut It” Bill) and he’s a regular there… she was nervous that he would confront her – but he was pretty good about it. We saw him BAM! when we walked in the door -and other than looking a little hang-dog – he didn’t say a word.

Jule and I were at the same table and it was quite possibly the WORST. TABLE. EVER.  Going around the table we have:

Steve – mid 40’s, totally crunching on Julie, quite possibly the inspiration for the movie “40 year old Virgin”. Quizzed me about Julie when she got knocked off. I said she was sick (she is) and he turned into NOSEY McNOSERTON and was like..”sick how? like a cold? what do you mean?”  and I told him she was being treated for SARS…. He kept going allin, claiming he wanted to go home – and sucking out on everyone with his 3-4 off suit, etc. Nice enough guy, I suppose.  Probably has a MEAN action figure collection.

Assmunch –  We don’t know his name. It was his first time playing there and he was so annoyed with our table (I do understand that) that on break he just left. However, this sucked for us because the tournament people made us keep his chips in play. They made us deal him in and post his blinds. It was lame and there were several misdeals because of it. Please note: If you are in a freeroll game at a bar and don’t want to play anymore. Do everyone a favor and just go allin until you are out.

John? Maybe? – Announced he would be going in a lot.  He went allin a lot.  His K high couldn’t hold up. Out first.

Dan The Drunk – Dan had a beer in each hand. Dan would deliberate for 5 minutes before deciding to call. Sometimes Dan wouldn’t know it was his turn and we’d think he was deliberating. Dan couldn’t deal. Dan would remind himself on every hand that “Action is to the left of the dealer…”. Dan would say things like “I almost had a STRAIGHT BOAT!” and ” I was one card away from a FULL FLUSH!”.  Was Dan drunk? 

I’d say yes. 

Did he take everyone’s chips? 

Yes, he did.  It was unreal.

Didn’t stay for the late game and didn’t play at the drink table… but I made it pretty far again – down to 3 tables. 

As for today…. I’ve decided to be chill today.  I don’t mean physically.. because with this massive hyper coffee high I’m going a thousand miles an hour — but mentally… spiritually…. I am chill.

Chiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiill….

*sizzle*

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Sweet Fancy Moses! I won a drink!

December20

Kory and I met my friend Julie and her new…. Bill…. at Santorini on the west side. It’s a greek restaurant that has free Texas Hold ‘Em tournaments on Monday nights.  I LOOOOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE to play poker, so I was excited to play. Top 3 people get various prizes.. bottles of booze, NFL jerseys, gift certs for B&Bs and massages… pretty nice stuff… and the top 8 people get points that accrue through the season to get a playoff spot to play for a WSOP seat (World Series of Poker).

Julie, is a killer card player — she just gets pretty nervous when money is on the line so she likes these freeroll games…. Bill… is her new…. Bill. I don’t want to expound on Bill…. but I can tell you the following things about him:

1. He told Julie to stop saying “Doh!” which is her signature adorable thing that she does and even told me that he was going to “break her of that habit”

2. He ordered for himself and then informed Julie that she could just share with him – without checking if it’s something she’d like.

3. He was at least medium-obnoxious and Mr. Puffy Impress Everyone Man. He boasted about everything, in particular his impressive status at the bar and how he “knows the owners” and “can pull any strings we need pulled”.  Puff. Puff. Swagger. Swagger.

4. My parting words to him last night were, “Shut it, Bill”.

The poker tourney itself was super fun — and while I did not win the main tournament, I did outlast Kory, Julie and Bill….  and then won at the “Drink table” —  knocked out 5 people playing no-limit….

and I won a drink.

a lousy Windsor Diet….  man, that was a lot of work for a drink.

The people were great – I met a ton of very friendly and funny people (accept the guy that said that I sounded occasionally like “Karen from Will & Grace” – which can NOT be a compliment)

I’m looking forward to going back and making that final table and accruing some points… WSOP, here I come……

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