It’s totally not what you think, perv.
Sunday morning we headed off to meet Tha Fam at Old Country Buffet – affectionately referred to as OCB (yeah, you know me!)
Kor’s parents and the Powells and the Glasgows were all there and it was a morning of eating and rehashing Thanksgiving and drawing names for Christmas. I need to say that the drawing names thing was my MASTER PLAN because prior to my arrival on the scene (BD – before Denise) they ALL bought gifts for EVERY OTHER PERSON. Yeah, we are talking like 14 people all buying gifts for every other person. JEBUS. I honestly can’t tell if everyone actually is glad/relieved to be drawing names now – but to their credit, they’ve all accepted it graciously and probably only complain about it when I’m not around – which honestly, is totally fine with me….
Here’s my problem with OCB : People are buffet-retarded. A simple fact of life is that the line should move in one direction. That direction isn’t so hard to figure out because it should START on the end where the plates are and finish on the end where there is nothing. Hello? I mean, going to the buffet is like playing bumper cars – everyone sort of bouncing off each other and saying excuse me (or not) and reaching for the handles of the long hot spoons at the same time… this is Minnesota! Where is the civility? And what’s with the staring? What’s with the bald-faced inspection of everything on my plate as I’m walking by? GO LOOK FOR YOURSELF – my plate is not a freakin’ preview for you to peruse on the way up there! I swear, I’m wearing a cape the next time I go so I can make my plate and then pull the cape around me and the plate so I can walk back to the table in peace.
Here’s what I love about OCB : the beverages! How I love my plethora of beverages! I can have soda and coffee and juice and chocolate milk.. and *pant, pant*… MORE coffee and soda and…
Sam’s Club – Why do I seek out the Sample Ladies? I never even want what they have… and if I do want it, they are out or on break. I think it’s some deep-rooted animal instinct to locate free food? YUCK! That’s weird! I had a sliver of cheesecake (yum), a piece of porkchop (yuck), a pinwheel cheese thing (yuck) and a cracker with some spinach/artichoke dip on it (yum) — oooooh, and Chai. Kory found a sample of Chai for me and I’d never had it before. It was really good – so we bought some. WAIT A MINUTE – so that’s why the Sample Ladies are there. It’s a trap! Bastards.
Harry Potter — we saw this at the IMAX out at the zoo. It was my first IMAX experience with a full length feature film (say THAT five times, fast). Peter was actually shaking waiting for the movie to start he was so excited. The screen was huge and the sound was amazing — it really was great. The movie was better than I thought – though it had some “time” issues in that the events that take place over an entire school year appear to occur in a week or so. There was a small issue of some people who brought their INFANT to the movie and sat right behind us. She didn’t cry, but talked in baby babble the entire movie. I went back and forth between wanting to kill the parents, thinking she was actually a pretty good baby and forgetting them completely. I didn’t actually have words with the people – so I was on good behavior…. however, I HATE WHEN PEOPLE BRING BABIES TO THE MOVIES!!!! Get an f’ing sitter or STAY HOME. Especially when these tickets were $14 a pop. Grrrrr.
It was really good, though…. see how I can separate my irrational anger from my ability to reason?
It’s one of my Sweet Skills.
Monday now….. ugh….. and only 27 shopping day until Christmas.