November 8, 2007

Metaphorical blanket

Filed under: Uncategorized — admin @ 8:08 pm

Last night, I had a poorly timed argument with my husband at 2:30am.

I knew, when he came to bed that I should not ask about the issue. 

I knew that 2:30am was surely NOT the time to have that talk.  I know that once riled up I am not likely to throw on the brakes and that by the time I begin the “Whatever”  “Let’s drop it.” “This is stupid.” phase is just about the time that Kory is ramping up to full speed and has now thought of all the responses to all the catty slams I threw at him an hour ago.  He is now reaching full-stride and the last thing he is interested in at this point is dropping ANYTHING.

I, spent, have already spewed all the bile that is my anger. I am done, but Kory wants his chips back. He’s not really to get up from the table.. and so we plod on through the argument.  He, making his points.  Me, alternately trying to float away in my head and allowing him to pull me back in.  The blanket, as this bed-fight continues, grows smaller… and smaller.

I pull the covers over.

“Why are you taking all the covers!?”, I yell.

“I’m not!”, he yells back.  “I hardly have any either!”



“THIS”, I snap while holding up the corner of the blanket, “IS ALL I HAVE.”

“THIS”, he says holding up his tiny corner, “IS ALL I HAVE, EITHER!”

I stomp from the room.  “I’m getting my own blanket from the couch!”, I yell over my shoulder.

“How can a blanket that we’ve been successfully sharing for 3 years on our bed suddenly not fit?!!!!!”, I hear him yell from the bedroom.

I am already in the dark living room, avoiding a Diet Coke can and the baby’s toys and all of the remotes on the floor. We have 3 remotes and I can’t explain why – but one does everything but the volume and one does everything and one does nothing but they all call our living room home and you never know which one you are going to be stuck with while the other two hide.

I’ll tell you WHY…   I snarl in my brain…

because you are completely unreasonable,  THAT’S why the blanket doesn’t fit…

because you don’t understand what I’m saying when I try to explain important things to me and you defend everyone and everything except the things and the people that I WANT you to defend..

and you are a selfish covers stealer…

and… and…

and I go back in the bedroom, dragging my own blanket behind me and I scowl at the clock that now says 3:11am….

I’m shaking with the unfairness of it all and I’m furious that I’m up at 3:11am, fighting with my selfish blanket hog husband who doesn’t understand why I am able to get so worked up over the PRINCIPLE of things and why it infuriates me that he likes to “examine and propose all sides of an issue” when what I want him to do is just  AGREE with me and stop examining everyone else’s possible motives and just rub my shoulders and say,  “You’re right, honey.”

This is the desperate part of the arguement where he, too, is done retaliating and he is ready for the fight to be over– but me, now I’m wallowing. 

Now, is when I say untrue things about how he doesn’t understand me and he never has and he never will and probably I’m the most misunderstood person in the whole world …

that’s when he leans over and rubs my shoulders and says,

“We just had the blanet on the wrong way, honey.”


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